love

Affectionate or passionate devotion. The Greeks recognized four aspects of love: liking of something (storage), friendship or fondness of a person (philos), erotic love (eros), and selfless love (agape).

The Greek philosophers Plato and Aristotle both hold that love is ultimately the desire of the imperfect for the perfect, whereas in Christianity love arises from the concern of the perfect (God) for the imperfect (human beings). St Augustine defines virtue as ordo amoris (‘the order of love’), which occurs when the love of God replaces the love of self. For St Thomas Aquinas, natural love concerns the passions and will, whereas supernatural love is natural love to which has been added habitual unselfishness.

Storage ‘liking’ This type of love is demonstrated when people use expressions describing something they enjoy doing or seeing, for instance ‘I love to read’ or ‘I love to eat cream cakes’.

Eros ‘sexual affection’, ‘passion’, ‘desire’ Erotic love is sexual love. While sexual desire and passion may fade with time, true erotic love has a tendency to grow and, over time, acquires many of the qualities of family affection and of friendship. This type of love is shown in the love between partners who are lovers.

Philos ‘love of friends and family’ The Greeks tended to group both family affection and friendship under one term. However, the modern world tends to distinguish between the love felt for relatives and for friends. Family love is also thought of in various ways: paternal, maternal, sibling (love between brothers and sisters), filial (love of children for parents), and love for other relatives beyond the nuclear family.

Agape ‘selfless love’ Agape is the most spiritual love. The Christian church identifies Christian love with agape, and includes charity, tolerance, and respect within the term. In the New Testament it is described as ‘loving our neighbour’. Christians believe that through agape, God's love reaches the world.

Modern psychotherapists often see personal maturity as a growth in the capacity to love and show respect both for themselves and others.