rites of passage

In Hinduism, the ceremonies, called samskaras, marking events in a Hindu's life. A Hindu may follow four stages of life, or ashrama: student, householder, hermit, and wandering holy man.

Marriage Marriage is arranged by the parents of those to be married, who look for the correct caste, and for educational and financial similarity. Horoscopes are drawn up and astrologers consulted as to the suitability of the match.

Traditionally, the bride wears red, the colour of prosperity and love, and she and the female guests have henna tattoos on their hands. The groom wears white to represent his purity and serenity, and has his face covered by a decorative veil; this recalls a time when the bride and groom may not meet until the wedding day. The couple sit beneath a decorated canopy. As part of the ceremony, the genealogy of each partner is read out, to ensure that they are free to marry. The father gives the bride away by placing her hand in that of the groom (the ‘taking the hand’ ceremony). Their hands may be covered with a cloth and tied with thread. The bride is symbolically joined to the groom by tying the end of her sari to his scarf. The couple sit in front of a sacred fire while the priest chants prayers, and rice is thrown into the fire, symbolizing the planting of the bride in the nourishing new soil of her husband's family. Rice is often used at weddings as a symbol of fertility.

As the couple walk three times round the fire, the groom will lead his bride and say the traditional marriage mantra. After this, the bride will place her foot on a large stone, while the priest tells her to be as firm and steadfast as a rock for her new husband and family. The couple will take seven steps around the sacred fire, each representing different hopes for their marriage. The priest instructs the couple to put their hands on their hearts, asks that their vows are made with an honest heart, and says that God will join them together. The groom lifts his veil, and the guests congratulate them, give them gifts of money, and shower them with petals. The couple will share a meal together, symbolizing their union from now on.

In the first year of marriage, the bride will make frequent visits to her parental home, but she will live permanently with her husband's family, and will be expected to remain loyal to them, and in particular to her mother-in-law, who may run the household.

Funeral If Hindus know that they are dying, many choose to spend their last days in a holy place such as Varanasi, because it is believed that this frees the person from sin. After death, and after the body has been washed, the son of the deceased says the sacred word, ‘Om’, to the deceased person. Men are wrapped in white and women in red. Only babies and holy men are buried, everyone else is cremated. The body is carried to the cremation ground on a stretcher, and fire to light the funeral pyre is brought from the deceased person's house. Traditionally, sons do this, and it represents the sending of the soul on its journey. The fire is kept alight with offerings of ghee (clarified butter).

Fire is an important element in several Hindu rites of passage. In this case, the deceased is making the final sacrifice of offering their body to the sacred fire, Agni. The feet of the body on the pyre will point south to the kingdom of Yama, the god of the dead, while the head will point north towards Kubera, the god of riches. Priests chant prayers, and a pot may be broken by the head of the body, symbolizing the freeing and release of the soul. Rice balls will be offered to feed the body in the afterlife. A properly conducted funeral is thought to prevent the soul of the deceased from becoming bound to remain on earth as a ghost (bhut). The funeral ashes are scattered in a river, preferably a holy river such as the Ganges. In the UK the ceremony takes place at a crematorium, and the ashes may be sent to India, cast into rivers in the UK, or buried. The mourners return home from the funeral without looking back (this might tie the deceased's soul to this world). There are 14 days of mourning, during which time the relatives remove the furniture from their house and sit on the floor. The deceased's widow wears white.